A Little Family Humor

My aunt sent a round mail today to all of us:

A woman said her son found his license plate missing so he called the police to file a report. They told him people were stealing the plates to get free gas. Given the rise in gas prices, people have taken to stealing license plates, putting them on their car, then getting gas and running. The gas station will have "your" license plate # and you could be in trouble for "pump and run." Check your car periodically to be sure you still have a plate. If you should find it missing, file a report immediately!!! Keep an eye on your license plate! Make sure you always know it's there! When the license plate is reported as the "drive off vehicle", it's YOU they contact! Be aware!!!! Be aware of your license plates, most of us never look to see if the plates are there or not.

Pass this along


My cousin, her son, wrote back:

Mom,

Thanks for the great idea, since I know Freddie is your favorite son I am going to steal his plate to get free gas and get him arrested. Then your precious little boy will just be just another dirt bag criminal. He will probably even lose his job. There is no way that you could ever love him then. I hope that you are happy with yourself, by sending out this ridiculous email you just got your son in big trouble. Now I just need to find a way to get you to hate Bobby, and I can slide into the number 1 spot. Holy cow I can't believe you send out this junk. I think you need a full time job.


Maybe you don't find this kind of thing funny, but I laughed out loud in my office.

New Twinge Obsessions

I've been kinda twingy in the abdomen and kinda nauseous for a few days. Just a little, just enough to notice. Today - nothing. I know, I know that this means nothing. But... where did my twinges go? They were kind of reassuring. I miss them.

Second beta test is tomorrow. When that turns out OK, then I'll feel much, much better. (I know everything will be fine. I think we already beat the odds and that we've already gotten past the hardest part of this whole process.)

Turns out the gut, it is full of shite

I took yet another home test before my 7 am official, medically certified pregnancy test appointment because I had one left and I didn't want it sitting there mocking me. Stark white. My butt in winter white.

So I kinda forgot to take my progesterone this morning (two suppositories three times a day - the joy at Chateau Beth never ends). I said screw it and had a cup of coffee and a cup of black tea. I made a date with a friend for sushi for tomorrow. I planned my next possible cycle dates. I rode roller coasters, chugged whiskey, and smoked up. Ok, maybe not that last part.

The clinic was supposed to call at 1 pm. My cell phone rang at 3 freaking 30.

"So... Mrs. G?"
"Yes"
"Born on a date you don't care to post on the internet?"
"Yes"
"You came in and took a test today?"
"Yes"
"At 7 this morning?"
"Yes"
"For Dr. R?"
"Yes"
"A pregnancy test?"
"Yes and for the love of George Michael will you please just let me get this horrendous phone call over with so I can go on drowning my sorrows in my whisky... I mean coffee... I mean wholesome water before I scream and cause a ruckus in my relatively new place of work that hasn't gotten to see the true quirkiness of me yet?"
"Congratulations, it is positive."

So I never got to watch a stick glow with the stinky goodness of a second pee line, but I think I can live without it.

(Beta is 148 and the next one is on Monday. Take that, stupid gut.)

The gut, it is mighty

I should know better than to dispute the gut. It is all-knowing and incredibly intuitive. It told me that I wasn't pregnant, and lo and behold - BFN this morning. Beta is tomorrow, but I'm not holding out hope.

The gut is now instructing me to pick myself up and get ready for round two. I'm going to listen.

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One little embryo seems to be OK at this point. So fingers crossed, we'll get to transfer it tomorrow.